My mostly unspoken but enacted commitments, to the best of my ability, to my teenage daughter, are that I commit to, with every ounce of my soul:
Be a warrior for you. I’ll go into any battle beside you and whenever necessary in front of you without a second thought.
Be a human for you. I’ll make mistakes and admit it when I do.
Be a listener for you. I’ll be ready when you’re ready to tell me what you want and sometimes even before you are (at which point I’ll refer you to the “human” entry above). I commit that I won’t try to fix it EVERY time (and when I do I’ll again refer you to the “human” entry above).
Be a joke for you. It’s one of my God given gifts and from God’s hands to our ears, I will share my rather weird view of the world and play off yours too as we laugh like crazy.
Be a teacher for you. Whatever I have learned and un-learned it’s there for you, any time you want it.
Be “not so serious” for you. I will to remind you that 97% of the time, it’s just not worth taking things so seriously and won’t judge you even when you do take seemingly smaller things really seriously…and even maybe laugh about it afterwards.
Be a cheerleader for you. I will share the fulfillment and joy I get in seeing the beauty of you competing in sports and when you succeed I’ll bust out the pompoms. I love that you love to win and compete.
Be a shoulder for you. When you need to cry and my shoulder is the one you need most or any other times it’s available…always.
Be authentic for you. I promise I’ll cry when I’m happy, sad, hurt, joyous, etc. and won’t fight to hold it in.
Be a reminder for you. I know you’re strong just as you are and so am I, I’ll remind us of that so we can get through things together.
Be a hug for you. Need I say more?
Be a model for you. I’ll teach you to succeed, not succeed “like a man”…that’s garbage.
Be an embarrassment for you. You have a Dad who is a goofball at times so I will almost certainly embarrass you, but you’re used to it right?
Be in the background for you. I commit to let you live your life, neither of us are happy when I try to control everything.
Be a pain for you. Yes, there are times when I’m going to draw boundaries, say no, call you out and when I do I will supply with a time honored source of rebellion for teenagers. If you aren’t pissed off at me on a semi-regular basis, I’m not doing my job.
Be a student for you. I’m willing to learn new things and realize you can teach me some of them.
Be realistic for you. You are a teenager and I promise not to give you the “back in my days” bs or the “you’re all so entitled” bs, I know it’s harder in some real ways to be a teenager these days and I know you’re a teenager and it’s unfair to paint with an old or irresponsible brush.
Be present for you. I commit that I’ll do the work when I’m not with you so that when I am with you I am.
Be a perspective for you. I’m willing to share when I’ve been through tough things that might be like what you are. I’m willing to remind you when you’ve gotten through tough things as you go through them.
Be a debater for you. Let’s argue about things going on in the world, it’s worth it.
Be a believer for you. If you believe strongly enough in something and it’s at odds with the prevailing, broken point of view, I’ll back you…100%. If you’re following just to follow, expect us to go back to the previous line.
Be a believer in you. I believe in you 100%.
Be a truth teller for you. Even when it’s really uncomfortable I’ll do it.
Be a Dad for you. More than anything else, the one unchanging fact is that from the moment you were born, I’m your Dad and will be that until the day I die.
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