The God that works in my life has an ever expanding list of characteristics, but forgiveness is not one of them, it’s unnecessary.
If you hurt me, I may sit in judgement of you while being really victim-ish. I may tell friends my tale of woe hurt that may sway their view of you (intentionally or not). I’m human.
However once I forgive you, it was over. If it wasn’t over I didn’t really forgive you but when I did I felt at least at peace with myself and often harmony with you.
You see forgiveness is a wonderful gift given by God to humans as a means to have us reconcile to deepen our love for each other and ourselves. To perhaps feel a bit of what God feels for us.
Underneath forgiveness is compassion. It doesn’t mean I have to keep people in my life that I don’t want to but at least in forgiveness I can understand them.
The only reason we need forgiveness is because we are human, we make mistakes (no mistakes means no forgiveness). Mistakes separate us.
However, I’m NEVER separate from God. I may THINK I’m separate from God but I’m never truly separate from God. So, by definition forgiveness from God in order to feel one with God is unnecessary, I already am.
When you hurt me you may sometimes get on my bad side. Until there is some type of reconciliation you may stay on that bad side. Being on my bad side means I get to sift through the wonderful world of human emotions and indulge in them as I please. It may be as simple as I stop talking to you or as complex as I hurt you back…sometimes worse.
Again, my responses are the very definition of being human, but God’s not human. I think God gave us these human powers like vindictiveness, silent scorn or even revenge as a means to make forgiveness even more powerful.
When I feel I’m on someone’s bad side it often feels awful but I get it they’re human. I don’t believe there is such a thing as being on my God’s bad side. I think being on God’s bad side is ascribing a human experience to an infinite being.
If I can’t get on God’s bad side, then the vehicle to get on his good side (forgiveness) is unnecessary.
Strangely enough, when I eliminated forgiveness as an attribute of God I actually started to behave differently. You see when I think I may end up on God’s side I am more scared to make mistakes so my behavior and world shrink. And when I let fear guide me like this, I am almost certain to be a less loving, compassionate and (dare I say it?) forgiving person.
When I take forgiveness off the table with God it actually makes me even more responsible in my relationships. It takes more work for me in my life, not less because I want to feel in you and me the God that works for me that loves me no matter what.
I feel God through you.
In my world, God makes ALL things possible. It’s why God makes ALL of the human experience possible which includes gut busting laughter, toe curling orgasms, mind blowing feats, soul melting love and the tools of compassion and honesty often used in situations where someone hurts me which often leads to forgiveness.
Forgiveness is a key to the human experience but unnecessary for the God experience.
And if any of the above has made you upset with me…please forgive me. ;)