My daughter: Few words, many experiences

I have a new (challenge in communicating with my daughter.  She's mastered the ability to say almost no words and deftly end a conversation. 

Me:  How was your day?

Her:  Fine

Me:  What interesting thing happened today?

Her:  Nothing

Me:  What did you think about the Science test you took today?

Her:  Not much

Me:  Did they ask you about the endocrine system?

Her:  I don't remember

and so it goes.

I have certain tricks, etc. that I can use, but the fact is I know that there are ALL types of things that she is discovering and likely has questions about it.  But the other fact is, she doesn't ask me them very often.  I've learned quite a bit about giving her space to have and identify feelings.  The power of sharing my own experiences to tell her I've felt that way too.

But face it Tim, sometimes she doesn't want to talk.  She specifically tells me at times that she doesn't want to say too much because it's likely I will ask questions when she does.  (Which of course I will.)

I'm really tuned into her life at school, I know all her friends and go to her games/events.  But that sometimes still isn't enough.

My job now is to keep trying, but not trying the same thing and continuing to fail.  I'm open to and am learning about even more ways to try.  There's a bittersweetness to my angel face growing up.

In the end, I've got the ultimate trump card.  She doesn't even need to respond to it.  The card:

I love you.

 

Comments

[twitter.com/chrisyeh]

It sounds like a perfect example of the Alex P. Keaton theory: At some stage of their lives, kids want to be the opposite of their parents.

[Jackie]

I'm glad you're letting her not talk. I still have huge resentments against people who exercise their control issues by trying to get me to talk when I am giving them every indication (even saying outright, "Sorry, I'm not in the mood to talk") that I want nothing less than to speak.

[Tim Taylor]

Thank you Chris and Jackie, I'm definitely learning and am open to the lessons...