Paralysis vs Vulnerability

I was chatting with a friend today and I realized how much I missed the beauty and rewards of blogging.  Admittedly, when I first started doing this, I shared EVERYTHING.  And a year or two ago, I un-published (is that a word??) a thread of posts that were way too revealing.

I feel like as soon as I took that step, I quickly skidded downhill to a point where I didn't feel like I should share anything.  Or even worse, that perhaps I need to be "right on" or "moving" with each post.  My arch nemesis ego moved in swiftly and without remorse to cut me off.  I started to become a slave to my "personal brand" as its called, which to me is a euphemism for ego.

I fear vulnerability, I'm not unique that way.  But it's amazing how this fear increaseed since I stopped blogging.

Given my wide reaching audience of 3-5 people, I realize that my main audience started as and is only myself.  If it so happens to reach or touch anyone else, great!  (And my experience has been that it has, in the most unexpected of ways.)

But if it doesn't, it's ok, because I realize that I blog to bring more love into the world, and that's about me and my actions.

I start from today and do my best from there.  It's not always pretty, but it is my journey.

Comments

[Nikki]

Great post Tim! I look forward to reading more.

[Chris Yeh]

It's good to have you back!

[McKenna]

Sometimes sharing our journey gives us insight that we only see from going back and reading what we've wrote. Good luck in your journey!

[louboutin]

It's good to have you back!

[birthday4all]

I dismay vulnerability, I'm not unique that way. But it's amazing how this panic increaseed since I stopped blogging.

[Christmas Message]

Christmas that encompasses the party of Xmas contributes some more merriment to it; and this is reasonable enough to call for the party of God Mass; the Xmas.